Somebody hit a lot of home runs last night--am I right? LOL!!!
Okay, my caption is a joke on how little I know about sports; that is to say, I know as much about sports as I do about astrophysics. And yes—it’s touchdowns, I get it.
Even though I am far from a sports aficionado, I was peripherally aware of the importance of Super Bowl LVIII, which has become politically charged both off and on the field.
Why?
Something, something sassy, beautiful, smart woman loving democracy more than an Orange DicKtator, something, something self-same girl happy in a relationship with a football player who treats her with dignity.
You know, everything Christofascists hate.
Why, I haven’t seen right-wingers so pissed off about another American’s right to freely express themselves during a Football game since Colin Kaepernick dared kneel for social justice as they grabbed nachos and beer during the national anthem.
I heard the game was nail-bitingly intense, with the Kansas City Chiefs beating the San Francisco 49ers 25-22 .
Nioce!
Congrats, mah dudes, but yeah, the subtext wasn’t lost on me, as the game had symbolically become a battle between us evil libtards and the GOPers Sweet Jesus.
No—someone actually said that—sigh.
Dark Brandon poked MAGA in the eye
As you might have guessed, MAGA is taking the Kansas City Chiefs win kinda hard—they so mad ya’ll, you’d think Kid Rock came out as a Black pansexual who uses the pronouns she, he, and they.
Check out the Meidas Touch video below to savor the melt-in-your-mouth goodness of right-wing angst. Standout video responses were walking-talking bobblehead Charlie Kirk and resident mean girl Tomi Lahren, who simply had to weigh in—let's just say their stupidity remains unmatched.
Watching the numerous unhinged reactions online proves RWNJ's idiocy is as limitless and enigmatic as the vast vacuum of space and mayhaps as dangerous to the human mind.
Trump Co. and the usual suspects spent Super Bowl evening melting down online and making themselves such easy targets, becoming the laughable snowflakes that they are. Everyone just had to pile on, and President DB was no exception!
Rawstory details the Dark Brandon’s epic trolling, which I am delightfully sure rubbed salt into the wound of soundly defeated MAGA minions.
The Kansas City Chiefs prevailed in the 58th Super Bowl sending the internet into giggles about the online conspiracy theories involving Taylor Swift and Joe Biden ahead of the game.
The conspiracy theory has something to do with a CIA operation involving Taylor Swift and her refusal to support Donald Trump in both 2020 and 2024. Among the conspiracies is that Super Bowl 58, when added together, 5+8=13 and "13" is the name of Taylor Swift's album, as FoxNews.com explained this week.
While the details about the conspiracy deviate, Swift is alleged to have invented it in a government lab so that 30 years later, she could date Travis Kelce while he plays for the Chiefs and help Biden win the 2024 election.
"The deep state never loses," joked Blake Brown.
Others, like former Secretaryof State Hillary Clinton, congratulated Taylor Swift's boyfriend.
But it was Biden who had the last laugh.
Muhahahahahahaha!!
Joe Biden and Clinton weren’t the only ones who enjoyed listening to the wailing, gnashing of teeth, and lamentations of right-wingers! I found a few hilarious comment gems on social media that were spectacularly glorious!
Allow me to share some of my top cosmically karmic ha-has with you below:
@TheGollyLlama
Somewhere in MAGA-land, they're orchestrating a recount on a Superbowl score and completely believe that they can change the results of that game.
@4leafclover243
They might start impeachment of the Chefs lead by MTG!
@dogrsqr
I was really hoping that the Chiefs would have won by the score of 46 to 45. It would have driven all the conspiracy nuts absolutely crazy.
Greta @GretaGrace20
Just in: Pfizer has released the results of its latest study showing vaccinated subjects are more likely to host SNL, win the Super Bowl & get the girl. While its unvaccinated cohort is prone to injury, unfortunate hair choices & being called 'asshole' on social media platforms.
Ricardo Santos
Too bad Kaepernick was not there with Pelosi and Harris! Those mother*fckers would have been bed-wetting!
K2E7
MAGA Heads exploding. Team Tay Tay or Team Gay Bay? I lifted this from another poster on Mediaite. I'd love to take credit, but l can't.
Long Duck Dong
Super-competitive alpha males choosing to lose the biggest event of their lives to help one guy’s girlfriend? Sounds totally legit.
Go, Babies, go!!
Have a foot-BALL!
Regarding the continuous savory portions of schadenfreude you’all will be indulging throughout the day, I bid you bon appetite, and please, share whatever tender morsels you may have come across below!
MUAH! Ciao for now!